How To Poop In The Woods

It isn't difficult to have a poop in the woods when you're out camping miles from anywhere. You just want to find a spot where you can have a few minutes of privacy. After all, it's kind of awkward to have your pants round your ankles and have somebody catch you by surprise...

You only need a few things to make your toilet expedition a successful one, and the first and most important of these is toilet paper!

The second most important item is a toilet trowel or small spade so you can dig a hole to squat over. This orange colored plastic trowel is light weight and only costs a few dollars. It is available from most camping stores.

The hole you are going to poop into doesn't have to be a big one. Not really... Something about 6 inches deep (15 cm) and as wide as a bowl of cereal will do fine.

We'd call it taking a poo, here in Aussie land. I know British soldiers used to refer to it as going for a shovel recce.

(It makes more sense once you realize a recce is an abbreviation for the French word, reconnoitre, as in to spy out the lay of the land.)

When the soldiers walk out of their tent carrying a shovel and a roll of toilet paper, everyone knows what they're planning. It's not difficult.

So when you've gotta go, just stack the earth you've dug up to one side, squat and do your business, wipe yourself and make sure the soiled paper is placed in the hole, then cover it up with the soil again.

If you're sure nobody is going to appear suddenly and see you, you can take off your pants completely and place them a few feet away -- like hang them on a bush maybe.

Once you've finished and covered the mess with soil, you can then tread very lightly on the mound to compress it slightly. Don't press heavily, or your feces it likely to be squished out of the hole again, which defeats the whole purpose, doesn't it!

Oh... And don't forget to put your pants back on again before you walk back to camp!

The third important item to have is some means of washing your hands. If you can use soap and water, then please do so. Otherwise a moist towelette -- such as the ones given free when you buy take-away fried chicken will do fine. Just carry the foil sachet and the used towel out with you for proper disposal. Please do not litter our countryside. There are more than enough jerks doing that already. You don't have to be one too.

Also see: Sanitation When Camping